Duty and Honor

I am to be Guardian to a mountain now? What is the weight of a mountain to one who has already taken it upon himself to save two peoples? Just one more duty. I will continue to do my duty until it is the death of me.

These... things... tell us that we are gods. That we are each of us the embodiment of a concept, an ideal, an emotion, and not very good ones at that. They tell us that our very being generates the Enemy, or at least draws them. So be it. Even more reason for me to dedicate myself to fighting them if I am somehow partially responsible for them. I am not sure I believe that, as the Enemy is ancient, but I cannot afford to simply dismiss it. We ran and we hid, but they found us anyway. Now there is nowhere else to run. We will fight or we will die. Perhaps we will fight and die. Either way, the line will be drawn here!

Will these Kyo Tee-Shee help us? They give us nothing but riddles. They say that they eat the Enemy, feed on this 'manna', but it seems that 'manna' is just soul-stuff. The same thing that the Enemy seem to feed on. Can we trust them? All they seem to do is give us more damn riddles! They say that we may be able to stop the Enemy, but they offer no advise as to how. They sit up there, so smug, possessing so much power but refusing to do anything but watch! They say they do not want the Enemy to be stopped! As far as I am concerned that is the greatest dereliction of duty. They have the power to help, yet they refuse. In that case, begone! If you will not help then you stand in our way! Begone or my blade will find you next!

Una says I am behaving wildly, childishly. Do you not understand? These honorless creatures have no right! No right to define us, no right to sit in judgment over us. They will not even fight to save their own planet! They say you are the incarnation of vengeance. No! You deserve more than that! You are the kindest, most nurturing person I have ever met! You deserve to find a healthy young Vorax mate and save your people, not be drawn into a hopeless battle with an Enemy that has chased my people across the stars!

All of you deserve better. The Karians, so full of life and light and wisdom. We brought this upon you, and for that I am truly sorry. Moses, so gentle and good, always willing to put himself before others, always willing to love his fellows. You deserve a life in which you may follow your ideals and see the bloodshed end. You are a better man than I will ever be, for while I understand and follow the precepts of honor and duty, you live them by default; they are ingrained in your very soul. And even Rei, who was given the worst possible start, who sometimes does not even seem to be a whole person, but the important thing, the most important and wonderful thing, is that she is trying! Do you hear that, Kyo Tee-Shee? We are people! Complex and growing and alive! We will not be your one-dimensional gods! We deserve better than that.

Sometimes I think that perhaps it would have been better if we had never escaped. If the Enemy had simply finished us off so long ago, and we had never come here. We have caused so much pain, so much trouble to this world, I have to wonder if we even have the right to go on. But if we fall, the Enemy will not be sated. I have seen that they can possess Karians as well as Cheldrun. So for every one's sake, Karian and Cheldrun, I must stop them. Somehow, some way, I will dedicate every breath left to me to stopping them. Because the people of this world, no matter their origins, deserve better. And it is my duty to give it to them, god or not.